Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow

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Thu, 09 Aug 2012 12:27:17 -0400

Spread the word like Jesus yelled it at you from a mountain.

Fri, 13 Jul 2012 16:52:30 -0400

Spread the word like Jesus yelled it at you from a mountain.

Press Liqui-Gel for Rapid Release*

Wed, 11 Jul 2012 14:55:42 -0400

Press Liqui-Gel for Rapid Release*

AUSTIN, PA- UT Austin student Paul Benefiel, Patient Zero of the great PAC outbreak of 2012, and Remy Maisel of Penn State have agreed to overlook the long-running volleyball rivalry between Penn State and UT Austin that neither was aware of in order to partner up and claim second prize in the Colbert Super Fun Pack challenge: the 2012 presidential election. They use the word “partner” in the job-createy, businessy sense, like God intended, not in the gay sense. Never that.
…
Mr. Benefiel and Ms. Maisel tossed a coin to determine whose name would be listed first in the rest of this press release. Mr. Benefiel won, but, in what will likely go down in history as the biggest judicial upset of the year, the decision was overturned on the grounds that Ms. Maisel edited this last.

Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow and Texans for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow will go together where dozens of PACs have gone before. And we’re on our way there already, wherever it is. We’ve had conference calls, once we remembered that Texas and Pennsylvania are in different time zones, which, Ms. Maisel would like noted, she did first. We’ve wondered whether we were breaking the law just by having some of the conversations we had, but, it turns out, all’s fair in love and election-buying. We’re even going to produce things. Things that will tell you just how much we love our super PACs. Things that come straight from the gut.

Things like this:

“First, we’ve got the premise that money equals speech. We accept that as truth, because the Supreme Court is only wrong on the days Justice Roberts takes his epilepsy medication, which he definitely didn’t do when they wrote the Citizens United decision. So that means the individuals who donate $5, $10, $50 to a campaign, they’re just voicing their support,” quoth Ms. Maisel. “But when super PACs and the people who bankroll them are talking, they’re standing on the table with bullhorns and screaming loudly enough to drown out the $5 whispers from down below. Well, that looks like much more fun. Make room; we’re coming up.”

Ms. Maisel somehow forgot to ask Mr. Benefiel if he’d like to quoth anything as soon as she found out that UT Austin eventually did beat Penn State at volleyball. Weird.

We’d love to hear from you! Questions and complaints can be directed to:

Mitt Romney for President 2012
c/o Rafalca Romney
585 Commercial Street
Boston, MA 02109

We’re not coordinating or anything; we just share a warmblood for tax reasons.

You may direct compliments to Remy Maisel at psusuperpac@gmail.com.

PSFBTT and TFBTT are currently accepting donations.

*For the temporary relief of PAC-related anxiety, nausea, and Gob Bluth syndrome-the sinking feeling that the Supreme Court has just made a huge mistake. If discomfort persists, seek immediate attention from the FEC.

Check back at 3pm for our press release

Wed, 11 Jul 2012 12:03:48 -0400

The PSFBTT announcement is email-only until we send the press release to the media tomorrow. Then it...

Tue, 10 Jul 2012 22:05:53 -0400

The PSFBTT announcement is email-only until we send the press release to the media tomorrow. Then it will be public.

Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow is emailing out a big announcement right now.

Tue, 10 Jul 2012 21:56:07 -0400

surprisy-frown:

It’s big. It’s exciting.

Members of Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow: be sure you’re on our email list so...

Thu, 05 Jul 2012 12:33:15 -0400

Members of Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow: be sure you’re on our email list so you don’t miss a big announcement soon!

time-travelingbrandythief: I am so excited. We are on the FEC...

Sat, 05 May 2012 02:33:51 -0400

time-travelingbrandythief:

I am so excited. We are on the FEC website.

theyoungturks: Super PAC polls Oh no, what have we done?

Wed, 02 May 2012 11:00:01 -0400

theyoungturks:

Super PAC polls

Oh no, what have we done?

Colbert Raises More Than PAC Backing Ron Paul

Thu, 26 Apr 2012 12:55:02 -0400

Colbert Raises More Than PAC Backing Ron Paul:

independentdestiny:

“Stephen Colbert’s political action committee has enough cash to play jokes and pull pranks through the presidential campaign, but for now the comedian is mum on how he plans to spend that money.

Colbert’s Super PAC, Americans for A Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow has $794,000 cash-on-hand sitting untouched in its coffers, according to March documents filed with the Federal Election Commission, making it wealthier than some PAC’s intended to back (legitimate!) presidential candidates.”

Haha, revolutionary my ass; you go Colbert! Although simply getting money wasn’t the point (exposing the danger of SuperPACs was), i’m sure he’ll put it to good use.

This is fantastic.

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Thu, 26 Apr 2012 00:09:51 -0400

That's a fract: Forgiving GoDaddy: hilarious things have kept happening to me since I started this Super PAC

Tue, 24 Apr 2012 12:24:57 -0400

That's a fract: Forgiving GoDaddy: hilarious things have kept happening to me since I started this Super PAC:

time-travelingbrandythief:

I got a call from GoDaddy.com, since I bought a website from them. I wasn’t expecting this level of customer service—actually, I rather resent them for those commercials.

The guy who called, let’s call him Mark (because that’s his name! No, kidding, I forgot his name immediately after he told…

Don’t forget to check our our website!

Adventures in Super PAC filing

Sat, 21 Apr 2012 04:08:06 -0400

Adventures in Super PAC filing:

time-travelingbrandythief:

Today was a very productive day for Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow.

First, one of us figured out a clue that stumped us all day Thursday. I can’t say any more about it than that.

It seems, of course, that the more discoveries we make, the more inscrutable the map gets. But we press…

myselfisahugegossip: Stephen talks to Jon Stewart about...

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 01:13:15 -0400

myselfisahugegossip:

Stephen talks to Jon Stewart about SuperPAC without coordinating with him.

Money, Politics and the Law: Trevor Potter corrects 5 myths about super PACs

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 00:57:01 -0400

Money, Politics and the Law: Trevor Potter corrects 5 myths about super PACs:

citizensunitedlegalforum:

One of the goals of this blog is to set the record straight on Citizens United and its effects and a new piece by Trevor Potter (former Commissioner and Chairman of the Federal Election Commission and Stephen Colbert’s lawyer) achieves that goal very effectively.

Writes Potter:

The…

time-travelingbrandythief: Official Super PAC business in...

Fri, 20 Apr 2012 00:32:54 -0400

time-travelingbrandythief:

Official Super PAC business in progress!

Colbert Super PAC Comes to Penn State, Brings Students Into Activism

Wed, 18 Apr 2012 00:18:52 -0400

Colbert Super PAC Comes to Penn State, Brings Students Into Activism

The email list is growing steadily!

Fri, 13 Apr 2012 14:22:29 -0400

If you have not yet, please either email psusuperpac@gmail.com to be added to our email list or comment on the post on the Facebook page where everyone else is adding their email addresses. That way, we can keep track of them all.

Meeting minutes from last night have been sent out to everyone whose email address we had last night. We will send them out again as we get more email addresses.

It’s important that we have everyone’s full name, email address, occupation, and employer (can be “student” at “Penn State”) for our records, as once we begin collecting money for the 501(c)(3) or for t-shirt orders, we will need to carefully keep track of every dollar we take and from whom. We don’t want to incur any 4-6 figure FEC fines—even though, if we did, we could pay them with Super PAC money.

Happy recruiting, Colbert Nittany Nation!

The first meeting of Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow was a resounding success

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 21:14:48 -0400

The first meeting of Penn Staters for a Better Tomorrow, Tomorrow was a resounding success:

time-travelingbrandythief:

Turnout was great (better than expected considering that apparently Dayglow is tonight and there were quite a few people who messaged us to say they wanted to come but had conflicts). The people were great. 20 instant new friends!

We decided, by unanimous vote of present members, to go ahead and…

An excellent first meeting!

Our video of the day! Stephen and Jon push the non-coordination...

Thu, 12 Apr 2012 13:00:12 -0400

Our video of the day!

Stephen and Jon push the non-coordination loophole to its limit.